+JMJ
A Contemplation From the Woman with the Hemorrhage
We are a couple of days into Lent now. I feel now is a good time to take a good hard look at my habitual sins. The sins that linger and soil the cleanliness of my soul.
We all have hidden, or maybe not so hidden, afflictions. Wounds that deplete us and keep us turned in on ourselves, and drive us away from God. Wounds that seem to be impossible to cure.
But Jesus has the answer for all of that.
The Woman With the Hemorrhage
There was a woman afflicted with hemorrhages for twelve years. She has suffered greatly at the hands of many doctors and has spent all that she had. Yet she was not helped but only grew worse. She had heard about Jesus and came up behind Him in the crowd and touched His cloak. She said, “If I but touch His clothes, I shall be cured.” Immediately her flow of blood dried up. She felt in her body that she was healed of her affliction. Jesus, aware at once that power had gone out from Him, turned around in the crowd and asked, “Who has touched my clothes?” But His disciples said to Him, “You see how the crowd is pressing upon you, and yet You ask, ‘Who has touched me?'” And He looked around to see who had done it. The woman, realizing what had happened to her, approached in fear and trembling. She fell down before Jesus and told Him the whole truth. He said to her, “Daughter, your faith has saved you. Go in peace and be cured of your affliction.”
Mark 5:25-34
My Contemplation
As I put myself in the scene as the woman with the hemorrhage, I can feel the vast crowd around me. I am unnerved because there are so many people. I don’t feel well, just so tired, and all the noise is overwhelming.
I can just see Jesus moving through the crowd and I am immediately drawn to Him. I begin pushing my way through the crowd, making very slow progress. He seems to be getting farther and farther away. The desperation grows and anxiety sets in. He was my last chance. All the doctors I had seen had not helped me. I had nothing left.
“Lord, please wait,” I whisper and He immediately stops…. as if He hears me.
I push through the crowd, the anxiety grows the closer I get.
“Please wait,” I whisper over and over again praying He doesn’t start walking again.
I am almost to Him when someone trips me at the last second and I hit the ground hard. When I look up I can see Jesus directly in front of me. The hem of His cloak within reach.
“Do I dare touch Him?” I think as the doubt creeps in.
“But if I just touch His clothes I shall be cured.”
So, I reach out and touch the hem of His cloak. It is a small graze with just my fingertips. The pain within me is gone immediately. I drag myself to my feet shocked at what had just happened. I was cured, I knew it.
Jesus turns and says, “Who has touched my clothes?”
I become afraid thinking, “Maybe, I shouldn’t have touched Him?”
But I speak up, trembling all over, throwing myself at His feet, “It was me, my Lord!”
He reaches down to lift me up to my feet, “Daughter, your faith has saved you.” He removes His cloak, wraps it around my shoulders, and says, “You are cured of your affliction, go in peace.”
Community
I can imagine the state this poor woman must have been in before Jesus healed her. I am familiar with her physical pain, as I suffered with a mystery illness for many years. I, too, saw many doctors who could not figure out what was wrong with me. I understand her completely in that respect. She had suffered 12 years with the hemorrhage. She was probably incredibly anemic and weak. It was probably incredibly difficult for her to get up out of bed, let alone fighting through a crowd to get to Jesus.
I did not suffer the shame and abandonment she would have had to endure though. On top of her physical suffering she would have had to suffer the humiliating shame of being deemed unclean. This making her unable to participate in the life of the community. She would would have been barred from attending synagogue and pushed to the outskirts of society. She would have been separated from everyone she loved and excluded from their protection. Left to fend for herself and be at the mercy of the world.
This is what sin does. It makes us unclean, keeping us separated from the one we should love above all things. It pushes us to the outskirts of His Kingdom, making it difficult to participate in His glory.
He made us a community, One Body, and so it is incredibly important that we do not push ourselves out with the uncleanliness of our sin. The community of the church, the Bride of Christ, strengthens, protects, and sustains us. Not to mention we all have a role to play in it.
Coming to Him completely honest about our sins will allow Him to heal them and remove them. So use Lent to figure out what the hemorrhage is in your life. Then reach out and touch Him, drop to your knees at His feet, and bear your afflicted heart and soul to Him. He is the only one with the power to heal you completely. Let Him make you clean and draw you into a deep relationship with Him and His Church.
Thrive in Jesus, my Friends!
Take some time to find the areas in your life that are pushing you away from God. What can you do to work on that? What needs to be healed: Old wounds? Repressed Emotions? Ailments? Afflictions? Temptations? Ask the Lord to clarify it for you.
New to contemplative prayer? Check out my post here to learn more!